Just a Little Ranting...

Well I’m supposed to be sewing knifes into my dress for my knife throwing dead target girl costume, complete with matching knife throwing boyfriend, or cleaning my messy house, or anything productive – but instead I am writing a blog.  I have a headache from too much wine last night, and while I am not hung over, I am feeling extra lazy today. This is not new, as I have been feeling lazy for the last two months. Hence drinking too much wine.

I want to rant. I miss home. I don’t really like our place here in Burbank, CA. I feel bad for our pets because it is cramped in here with two cats and two dogs. I want a bigger place so my cats can hideaway when they feel like it, and a decent size yard for my dogs to play. I know I sound petty, but with the amount of money we spend to live here we could have all the above in Sacramento, and we did have it in Reno. I guess it all boils down to me not wanting to live here. It is way too expensive, and it doesn’t offer anything to me to warrant the expense. Rich loves it here, but I would be happier in a house in Sacramento, or heck back in our house in Reno for that matter. Some people are willing to give up certain amenities or luxuries to live in an exciting city, but I guess I’m just too old for that now.

I took so much pride in our house in Reno. I have always taken pride in my house, keeping it cute and clean all the time. But now I’m just blah… What does it matter? It’s not like we are going to have any company, all my friends and family live six hours away. Plus, the place is so small my furniture doesn’t fit, so it won’t look nice anyway. This is the first time ever I have let my house go. I just don’t care.

I find myself spending a lot of time daydreaming about moving back to 4^th Avenue in Curtis Park. I love Curtis Park! I want to buy a house there and never leave. When I think of home, I think of 4^th Avenue. I think of the tree lined streets, quirky houses, and all the character in the neighborhood. I also love how close it is to everything in Sacramento! You’re right down the street from downtown, and have access to all the freeways so you can go anywhere in no time, unlike some areas that confine you to one highway.

I’m working on my application to Graduate School, or at least I am getting up every day and telling myself to work on it, even if I procrastinate like normal.  I plan to apply to Cal State LA and a few other state schools down here, but I’m also sending an application to Sacramento State.  Who knows maybe I won’t get into any schools down here, and if I get into Sac State then sorry hun this is my career, I’m moving back to Sacramento.

I feel like I should fill everyone in on why I moved to Southern California, and why I feel inclined to stay even though I’m not happy.  I did it for Rich.  He moved to Reno with me for my job, and when that fell apart I thought I would return the favor and move here with him for his school.  He wants to work in visual effects, and Los Angeles is of course the entertainment hub, all the work he wants to do is down here.  I am a very driven person and I refuse to give-up on grad school and my goal of becoming a social worker, so I would never expect him to give up on his dreams either, hence my willingness to help him move mountains to follow his dream, and to live somewhere I can’t stand.  Well, it’s not all bad, but crowded and expensive and so on.

I guess I’m writing this blog to get some stuff off my chest, even if nothing changes at least I blew off some steam.  The holidays are also around the corner and we can’t go home this year…that makes me very sad. For one Rich has to work, two we are sharing my car so it’s not like I can take off without him, and three we just can’t afford it after the expensive move.  So yes, I am feeling extra home sick for this reason, and feeling a little sorry for myself. But I will be ok, I figure since I can’t go home I might as well do some good and volunteer at a soup kitchen or food bank on Thanksgiving and Christmas. At least this way I will still be able to surround myself with people for the holidays, and feel good about what I am doing vs. moping around at home continuing to feel sorry for myself.

Well that’s all the rant I have in me today.  Think I will go on craigslist now and search for houses in Curtis Park, like I do everyday and daydream.

Thanks for reading,

Kelly

The Move From Reno to So Cal and Everything In Between

Lets see, where do I start?  Today is October 12th.  Rich and I left Reno August 15th, so it has been nearly two month since we moved and FINALLY things are starting to feel somewhat normal.  We move a lot, but I have to say this has been the craziest move ever!  Hence no blogging, I’ll explain…

It started with loosing my job in Reno, and getting pulled into the middle of a huge fight between Rich and his sister (my previous co-worker).  The loss of job and fight are unrelated, but I think the stress of it all added to the tension and escalated the situation.  I will spare you the details, but lets just say the whole thing seems silly to me.  Rich’s family is very close and they spend a lot of time together, now there is tension and the entire family suffers.  I think it is selfish to act in a way that distresses your whole family for your own sake, but that’s just me.  Needless to say no one was on speaking terms when we left Reno, and sadly it remains the same today.  But I digress. 

We left Reno on a Sunday and planned to spend a few days in Sacramento before we hit the road for Southern California, partly to visit but also because our friends in So Cal weren’t available until later in the week.  We planned to stay at my Grandparent’s house and visit some friends before we left.  Mind you at this point Rich and I were homeless and had our huge Uhaul and pets with us.  By some miracle my Grandparents were out of town that week (it has been twenty years since my Grandfather has taken a trip), and my Mom and Aunt were there house sitting.  I adore my Grandparents, but if I showed-up with our two cats and two dogs, they would have lost their minds and I am so grateful to have avoided that!  My Mom and Aunt have an easier time going with the flow.  Or so we thought.

We arrive at my Grandparents Sunday night and there is an obvious tension between my Mom and Aunt.  My Mom later tells me that the two of them have planned an elaborate house cleaning/reorganization to surprise my Grandparents when they get home, and that they have reverted back and are fighting like teenagers again…great, haha!  Then Mom tells me that my Aunt doesn’t want us to keep the animals at the house.  Great, what am I supposed to do now?  Mom says don’t worry, that it is just as much her parents house as it is my Aunt’s, and to just ignore her.  Okay, easier said than done, but I will try.  And my Aunt doesn’t make it easy.  We confine the cats to one room, and try to keep the dogs outside as much as possible, but my Aunt feels bad and lets the cats out of the room and brings the dogs inside.  Okay, very sweet of her.  Then she starts to complain about the litter box, and seems to think every spot on the floor is an animal stain.  I say okay then lets put the cats back in the room and take the dogs out, I don’t want them to be a burden.  No, she says.  Then what do you want Lady make up your mind?  But no, she wants to be crazy, and she continues to be crazy all week.

It is finally Thursday, time to head down to Southern California to find a place to live!  We pack up the two dogs, and my Mom agrees to watch the cats at her place until we can come back for them in a week.  Our friends have two cats and it was going to be too hard to stay there with all our pets.  After what felt like an eternity, we finally arrive in So Cal and the first thing we have to do after the six hour drive is unload the Uhaul into storage.  We received a free month from Uhaul, and it was sooo much cheaper than paying to keep the truck.  That had to be the hardest part, unloading the Uhaul knowing in a week we would have to rent another truck and do it all over again.  But it was the only way.  After the grueling day was over we were happy to head to our friend’s place for some rest!  We stayed there a few nights, and by Sunday we found a cute little place in Burbank with awesome landlords.  They let us move in before the 1st and they didn’t even charge us a pet deposit!  It had been a week since we left Reno, and we finally have a place to call home again!  Now the grueling task of unloading the storage unit, loading everything into our new place, and heading back to Sacramento to pick up the cats.  Sounds simple enough right, you would think.

We felt bad cramming our dogs into our friend’s tiny place, so that night we decided to stay at our new place and sleep on the air mattress.  The next day I get up and plan to call Uhaul, but I decide to check my bank account first.  I am shocked to see I am $600 short!!!  What???  An old debt that I was told would go away had come back to bite me and auto-withdrew $600 from my bank account!!!  Talk about timing, there could not have been a worse time for this to happen.  I freak out because this means our entire moving budget is ruined.  I can’t afford to rent a Uhaul, I can’t afford gas to drive to Sacramento to get the cats, and our first months rent is due in a few days on the first - what am I going to do?  I was just about ready to breakdown when I remembered our landlords saying we have an option to pay rent on the 1st or the 15th, again awesome landlords, so I call and ask if I can pay a ½ months rent on the 1st giving me two weeks to recover before paying a full months rent on the 15th.  They said no problem!  But we were still short on cash, and had to sit in an empty house for over a week waiting until we had the extra money to rent a Uhaul.  And my poor kitties had to wait another one to two weeks before I could swing the gas money and expense to drive to Sacramento, again.  Now it has been two weeks since we left Reno, we just got our stuff from storage, and we still don’t have our cats.  Things are moving slow as molasses, but they’re moving.  Oh but wait, there is still time to throw another wrench in the mix.

It is the beginning of the third week since we left Reno.  I call my Mom to check on the cats, and tell her it might be another two weeks until I can make it up to Sacramento.  She calls me back later in the week to tell me that right after we talked the cats got out and have been out for three nights!  She didn't want to tell me and was hoping she could find them on her own but she has searched the neighborhood with no luck.  I panic because they don’t know where they are or my Mom that well, and they always come home at night so they are obviously lost or ran away.  My Mom feels terrible and offers to give me $100 for gas to come help look for the cats.  Maybe they need to hear my voice, because she has tried everything else.  Rich is working and has my car so I can’t leave until Saturday on Labor Day weekend.  As soon as he got home I hit the road back to Sacramento to find my cats.  Don’t worry kitties, Mama is coming, I tell myself! 

Mom and I hit the streets the next day Sunday morning and about two hours in we find Roxie!!  I have a renewed sense of hope, so we keep up the search for Chloe.  We tap cans of cat food together, shake jars of treats, we even shake a bag of dry food to entice Chloe out of her hiding spot.  At one point we had five cats following us around the neighborhood, and Mom shook the bag of food so hard kibble rained down on her head and shoulders.  We laughed as all the cats around us enjoyed the food, and joked calling Mom the Queen of the Cat Ladies, raining down kibble from the sky!  The night was not without its laughs.  Another time we stopped to ask a group of people if they had seen a black and white cat and they pointed to the line of cats following us and said “Is it one of those?” as if we didn’t know they were there, haha!  But after ten hours I had to go to bed that night without my Chloe.  Where could she be?  I was heartbroken.  And I had to leave the next morning.  I tried looking for her for two more hours before I ultimately had to get in the car and drive six hours home without my Chloe.  I cried almost the entire way. 

I have had Chloe the longest, ten years, and I couldn’t figure out how I would ever get over this.  This sadness and guilt continued when one week after my trip to Sacramento on a Sunday morning my phone rings.  It’s a 916 #!!!  I answer the phone, and hear a woman’s voice say “I just saw your flyer at the coffee shop this morning and I think your cat is in my backyard.”  She went on to describe her markings and I heard a cat meow.  It was Chlo!  I can’t describe the joy and relief I felt!  I leapt up from where I was sitting and I thanked the woman over and over again.  I told her how much my Mom and I appreciate her calling and that she made my year!  I called my Mom and she immediately went to pick up Chloe (she was one block away), and a few days later Rich’s Dad (who drives a truck from Sacramento to Los Angeles every Wednesday) delivered my Chloe to me.  I feel like the luckiest person ever for having found both of my cats alive and healthy!!!  It had been four weeks since we left Reno, a solid month, and I could finally breathe easy. 

For the last month I haven't been doing much.  It is kind of hard when Rich has my car all the time and I'm not making as much money as I was in Reno.  But I've been having fun exploring Southern California.  I will always be a Nor Cal girl at heart, but So Cal has a lot of cool things and isn't too far from home.  Michelle and Charles were here over the weekend and we went to Santa Monica and Venice Beach, we did some sight seeing in Beverly Hills, and drove through Hollywood.  We also ate lots of yummy food at Cafe Colombia.  Things are starting to feel normal in a way, but there is also still some residual stress.  We still are not talking to Corine, my Mom and Aunt still have tension from there time fighting like teenagers, my Aunt decided to tell my Grandma about us staying there with our pets and now I think my Grandma is mad at me for not asking her first, I never got my $600 back which was a struggle after the expensive move, so on and so on. 

But on the bright side finding Chloe really helped lift my spirits enough to start unpacking and decorating.  I wanted to get the house ready for company too!  Pictures are up, mirrors are hung, books are in the shelves, dishes in the cupboards, all that good stuff.  We have also been able to see our friends down here a few times (as apposed to once a year like before), although I really miss my friends in Sacramento.  It has been a long and tough journey, but we made it!  Rich is working and has plans to start school in the spring.  I am going to start volunteering and working on my applications to Graduate School for Fall 2011.  All and all I think we have a bright future ahead of us, but if nothing else we have some awesome stories to tell for the rest of our lives.  That's what it is all about really, making memories, and 2010 will definitely go down in the history books for me!